Recent content by The Clamp

Just so you know, I’ll be leaven the funeral early.

As long as my employer pays me what they are contracted to pay me and what they said they would pay me when I signed the contract, I’m happy.

It’s Covid that’s done this. Covid and the subsequent withdrawal of praise and financial assistance from menial workers. During the lockdown, waiters and bar staff and the like were sat at home on 80% pay, getting £400 lump sums deposited into their accounts from universal credit every few...

I’ve heard that but when I am in Brighton which I am every Friday and Saturday night, it’s busy. Restaurants and bars are full. I can certainly understand people not wanting to work in it though. Who want to be shouted at by chefs, moaned at by customers, deal with drunk dickheads, groping...

The hospitality industry is largely staffed by young people. Trouble with that these days is if you don’t treat young people like Christ reborn and compliment and compensate them for every thing they do, they cry “Trauma”! And take you to court for causing CPTSD. Get them back down the mines...

I’ll tip for exceptional service. Saying hello, pulling a pint, and charging me £6.50 for the privilege? Frankly they’re lucky to get a f***ing “thank you”.

No. I shan’t be tipping bar staff. I tip my barber. I tip at restaurants that haven’t had the cheek to add on their own service charge and if they’ve given good service. I used to tip taxi drivers but they’re a rip off and mostly a bunch of ****s. That’s it. Sorry but my hard earned isn’t...

She peaked in the 90’s. I don’t really know what she’s up to these days but for a few years at the end of the last century, she was gorgeous and ruled the charts and arenas. All power to her.

Ah. That’s why all the neighbours are out in the back gardens keeping me awake on a rare Friday night off. How long is this going on for?

I just saw The Titanic coming through the clouds. It’s begun. To the capsules!

They do. They have proposed 3 or 4 collaborative initiatives. All turned down point blank by the Tory’s who then also tried to blame the French for the issues. Understandably causing the French to give up and let the boats leave for our shores. I guess they thought “if you won’t help solve the...

What would you say are the underlying problems?

I suppose the big difference here is that they are targeting the trafficking gangs and not the victims. Combine that with an efficient asylum processing system and anybody could reduce the asylum issue substantially within a year. I’m not saying Labours’ approach will succeed but thus far...

Haha! People try that all the time when I’m out on foot patrol. I fell for it once, never again. 🤣

At my school, If you fumbled the ball or dropped something in the dining hall etc you would be met with loud cries of “UNCO! UNCO”! As in uncoordinated. Was always quite funny.